Tuesday, 4 April 2006

House of flying daggers

Sometimes, flatmates have really annoying visitors and partners.

Such as the visitor took all the food my friend A had prepared and put in the freezer, and put it in a pile in front of his bedroom door, "because it looked disgusting".
Now Irish stew might not look to appetising in frozen form, but it does taste good.

Unless it's been left to defrost on the carpet over the weekend, that is.

Needless to say, this did not go down too well with A, who also had to contend with two suicide attempts and one sectioned flatmate in the same dwelling.

But J, on the other hand. He's now staying with me for a month. So OK, he stomps a little when he walks, but he does the dishes, doesn't leave the toilet seat up, doesn't (on the whole) eat other people's food and pays his way with rent and utility bills.

So you'd think my flatmates wouldn't mind him staying with me while we look for somewhere to live.

But no.

Annoying Flatmate (there is always one) has for some reason decided he's against J's presence.

For some reason, he hasn't made this clear although he's repeatedly been asked if he has a problem with it.

When I say "for some reason" I mean that he hasn't said anything because his own girlfriend has, over the past two months, stayed at our flat for 2x9 days plus another two long weekends (Thursday-Monday).

He has not on any of these occasions cleared it with the household.

This kind of situation drives me nuts. On one hand I can't be bothered having a great showdown with Annoying Flatmate (and believe me, there would be one if I mentioned anything).

But on the other hand I also feel really uncomfortable with his hostile remarks and notes left on the fridge (that old shared house dagger), all pointing out how crowded I've made it with one more person in the house.

So yesterday, when J was passing money to my flatmates by way of paying his share of the rent, Annoying Flatmate was more than happy to accept. You see, he only lives in a shared house because he's too fucking immature to take care of his finances properly. I suspect there are large credit card bills being paid off, which explains why he can't afford to live on his own despite earning a lot more than everyone else in the house.

Nice flatmate, however, thought it was ridiculous that J should pay. "You're not an extra burden on the household," NF said. And then, to AF: "Because YOUR GIRLFRIEND STAYS HERE ALL THE TIME. AND SHE NEVER PAYS ANYTHING."

J remarked later that it was as if I'd programmed him to say what I didn't want to say myself. Which, remarkably, I hadn't.

You could have heard a needle drop in the kitchen etc. etc. Icy silence. Then AF's frantic excuses, such as "she's never here for that long".

"But isn't she a student?" J offered as a peace accord. "She's probably not got very much money anyway."

AF: "No, she works full time, actually." Then realising he stabbed himself a bit there, he chose to disgracefully retreat to the living room to sulk.

Later on in the evening when J, NF and I were having a lovely dinner in our spacious kitchen (you see, the house is huge and can easily fit a large number of people), IF came back in and was all conciliatory, pretending earlier on never happened at all.

What am I going to do when I'm living with J alone? Do we have to make our own intrigues?


  1. Wow. AF morphed into IF while nobody was watching.

    He sounds like a twat.


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