Monday, 22 May 2006

Nesting and chickens

First of all, can I just say £10 FOR TWO CHICKEN BREASTS?! ARRRGH!!!

Secondly though, can I just say thanks for all the great advice and encouragement on how to make a relationship last that I received in response to yesterday's post. It's really, really appreciated!

A picture of somewhat cheaper thighs of happy chickens
You should all be invited to our future wedding... When J gets his arse in gear, I mean. But then I'd have to tell you who I am. Oh, the blogger's dilemmas...

Back to the £10 slabs of meat. I mean, implants for my own breasts would probably be cheaper based on a minute-per-minute enjoyment price.

The ridiculousness happened like this.

I woke at about 1000 this morning as IKEA called to say they would make a delivery between 1100 and 1500.

I had invited my friend S over for lunch, but had no food in the house. The IKEA delivery combined with rain (pissing it down outside) and my clever leaving of the bike at work the night before made me decide to go to the local butcher instead of to the further away supermarket to get some chicken for a Caesar salad.

I have walked past this butcher, which loudly advertises its 'Real Meat' afiliation, a million times, but never been in.

I walked in. Three white, middle class people were manning the counter (this should have been my first alarm signal).

I said, could I have two chicken breasts, please.

Two minutes later I stood in my middle class, victorian cottages residential street again, £11.60 poorer (I also bought some breadsticks) and feeling mugged.

OK, so they're happy chickens. OK, so he actually carved them off a carcass as I was watching; they weren't plastic wrapped.

OK, so they ended up tasting really nice, with a real meat texture, not the rubbery flavour of Tesco value chicken.

Still, £10!! Am I stingy or is that ridiculous?! Is £10 really the price for happily free-range reared chicken?

Or is it just a yuppy ploy to make money off people who are too snobby to shop at Waitrose (I dread to think that such people actually exist).

If I had that much money to spend on food, should I not instead maybe donate some more to charity and save a few lives in Sub-Saharan Africa, where I'm sure even a Dutch battery-farmed chicken would price-wise be out of reach for many families?

Does the world really need chickens that are this happy?

And if I was that concerned with animal welfare, should I not stop eating meat altogether?

A brochure the butcher's felt compelled to give me explained that supermarket free range chickens are often kept indoors. My friend S, who is from the countryside (her mum keeps horses and everything) pointed out that chickens indeed like to be kept indoors at night time, due to this little animal called 'fox'.

I picked up my Tesco free range eggs, and they did indeed state that the chickens "were left free to roam outdoors in the daytime".

I'm completely put off going back there ever again. Does that make me a snob, an animal hater or a surly miser?

Judge for yourself by visiting the Real Meat website. It's a bit scary, but you can get an £5 voucher. And it amusingly describes the chicken breast (£11.40 for 400g) as "the most tenderest part of the chicken". Apparently they sued the Beeb once for libel; I would love to know the details of that...

To brighten up my day again, like birthday and Christmas at once, IKEA arrived at my doorstep on time (!) and dumped off a bed, a wardrobe and a dresser.

I had just had lunch with my friend S, J was at work and because the delivery men probably thought they were dealing with a hot lesbian couple (S is blonde and everything) they decided to carry all our stuff upstairs for us.

S and I then had a total blast building furniture, nothing gives satisfaction like banging on a piece of wood with a hammer!

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