Wednesday, 18 October 2006

J vs Childhood Sweetheart

I just came home from an infrequent meeting with my childhood sweetheart (we spent about 6 stormy months together at the age of 15 and have remained friends ever since). He's as cute as ever and single; I'm genuinely worried about his happiness at the moment.

His girlfriend left him about three years ago, and since then he's broken his golden rule of never having a one-night-stand and generally been extremely unhappy.

I'm feeling really homesick, and I know that I could get back together with him, move back home and have everything I've ever wanted (apart from maybe a fulfilling career; although his father is an academic and has promised to help me get started should I want to pursue that path).

It really drives a stake through my heart to see him so unhappy; I love him deeply and although chances are he'd drive me up the wall after two weeks of living together, I decided to do a comparison. Conclusion to follow in a separate post, so watch this space... And you'll have to scroll or click here for the test itself; for some reason Blogger has put in a lot of space here!

Childhood Sweetheart vs J







Gorgeous, yet cute. Has good head of hair. Has lost weight lately, which is a plus. The 2nd best looking guy I've ever been with, I think. Only minus slightly less tall than some might like.


Ruggedly handsome. Minus for balding. Has put on weight lately, which is also a minus, but big plus for being physically active. Extremely attractive legs.


They are both sultry-looking and dark (as opposed to most of my other partners, strangely). Best feature of each is eyes and kissable lips; worst feature of each probably nose. This is eerie.


We've known each other for 15+ years. He reads my mind which is handy. Doesn't talk much but when he does, it's always worth listening to. Extremely shy with other people; doesn't like strangers.


He sometimes doesn't understand me, and gets touchy when depressed. Talks about himself for hours on end. When we do have conversations, though, he's great and I'm always learning something.


Probably the department in which CB and I are the best match.

Common ground

We both like PlayStation. He is not interested in football or sports in the slightest; great. Loves watching videos and going to the cinema. Has good taste in music and same penchant for guitar rock as me. However great drawback is that he is unlikely to ever humour any of my interests, and he hates horror films so no Buffy. Never ever finishes books he starts. Not big on travelling. We both like cuddles.


Doesn't like PlayStation or any other video games for that matter. Is obsessed with football and sports; future holidays likely to be scheduled around main sports events. Will never be able to go on a fairground ride as he panics just at the thought. Exclusively likes classical music, Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson which is a bit crap. Likes films and importantly is willing to put up with crap B-horror flicks just to please me. Makes an effort to do stuff he knows I like so huge kudos for that. Likes Buffy. Attempts to read.


Bottom line; CB and I have more in common, but J is more willing to work on things. Def. the weakest point of me and CB.

Values and political views

Left-leaning, but a bit capitalist.


Left leaning.


Perhaps tragically this is the department in which J and I are best matched.


Has a tendency to not show up for stuff without telling anyone, or being appallingly late (we are talking hours here) without giving notice. Not very big on formalities or manners. Eats quietly though.


The perfect gentleman in every way, only drawback would be if being too much of a gentleman was an issue. Minor subtraction for being late for stuff (usually about 45 min), though he always calls to apologise, and for making lots of noise while eating.


Again, I find it worrying that their bad points are somewhat similar.


I've never had sex with him (!!). From what I've heard from exes, he's not that interested in sex and prefers cuddles. He kisses like a god, though.


Not really that into sex, but when he gets going, he's amazing. In the top 3 I've ever had, and kisses really well. Smells and tastes nice and is willing to be my sex poodle.


J's minus two are for lack of frequency, which I actually think could be down to his depression. A bit unfair of CB, but hey, not being able to trick me into bed yet; it must mean something.


Has the golden touch. Owns several retail outlets and a lovely partment. Good amount of savings stashed away. However quite stingy in everyday life and unlikely to splurge on expensive meals out except for special occasions.


Will never be loaded, but is extremely organised. Knows where every penny goes and has quite a bit of savings plus inheritance worth taking into account. Frugal yet generous.


CB is enterprising, but J is quite simply the best man I've ever met when it comes to managing money.


Great. They wish I was their daughter and actually like me better than I like him. If we were to get together, they would hand over their recently-refurbished lovely house in a posh area and love me like their own. Yet would stay out of my way and let me do whatever I wanted with my life.


Awful. There is only one, but she hates me, pretty much, and thinks I'm not good enough for her precious. Would also interfere with everything from house buying to child rearing. She's recently made a slight effort and has offered to help us buy a house (which J refuses), so bonus points for that.


This is I think one of my main reasons for liking CB. His parents really are amazing and he gets on with them incredibly well. In-laws don't make or break it in a relationship, but they can certainly give it a firm push in either direction. J's greatest drawback.

Does he love me?

Yes, to bits... but possibly not exactly like that. I'm among his longest-standing friends and he respects me deeply, and there is still a bit of spark there, if only we'd let it be. Would be willing to share his life and fortune with me and be the father of our gorgeous children after a dream wedding to happen asap.


He says no, but if nothing else I think he's in love with me still. There is a definite spark. Reluctant to commit.


Well, here's the rub. Looks like I've matured into wanting to settle for safe rather than crazy "do anything for you" in-loveness.


Both boys score a 10/10 for domesticatedness (J is a better cook but CB is better at general housework, romantic-ness (penchant for deep stares, cuddles, hand-holding, surprises and big presents), personal grooming and hygiene (CB takes the longest to get ready out of any guy I know except my gay ex, and J is a religious morning showerer), religion (neither cares what I think or am), the amount of pain they've caused me in the past and taxi driver abilities (both would pick me up/drop me off anywhere at any given time).




They are both the same... What can I say. It's eerie. And honestly there was no tweaking of sums to make them match up. Or maybe I counted wrong (I'm not very good at counting. Should J get a brownie point for amazing mental aritmethic?)? So should a girl follow her heart and stay put, or follow her head and come home..?/td>

1 comment:

  1. Wow - they both come out as 69's. How cool is that???

    (I know, but I'm a bloke. I felt compelled...)


Thanks for not just lurking..

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