Friday, 26 January 2007

Losing a life

And when I got to work this afternoon, I was chatting to my colleague who had been away for a few weeks, ill. I asked her if she was better, and she made a "so-so" facial expression. I asked her what was wrong. She said she'd lost her baby.

By Thtstudios
What do you say to that? Is there any appropriate response? I told her I was incredibly sorry, and asked her what had happened.

She didn't go into detail, just said it had been incredibly physically painful and that psychologically speaking she was of course still recovering.

She hadn't been very far gone, so hadn't told anyone at work. Which I guess takes off a bit of the pressure of people coming over and asking you if you've painted the baby's room yet etc.

Still, I can't imagine what that must be like. It's the way she said "my baby", so clearly showing that this to her was already a fully formed individual with a place in her heart.

I never think about how this happens. I sometimes (quite often) worry that I won't be able to become pregnant as my periods are incredibly irregular, but I rarely worry about miscarriage. About 1/3 of all pregnancies end that way, but usually it's too early to notice, within the first couple of weeks.

I feel incredibly sorry for my colleague, but as I stated earlier, I don't really know what to say. Maybe there is nothing to say..

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