Sunday, 11 January 2009

Call him "miss the radar"..?


when no ones home
Originally uploaded by _Neverletmego_
Sometimes I really just long to be home alone, in that way I guess you never are when you live in a high-rise like I do at the moment. And yes, I also have a new Flatmate. Let's call him Mr Vain (30 years of age). Mr Vain's main characteristics, in addition to being vain, is that he is:
  1. Incredibly stingy: Despite his vanity he hardly ever buys anything to wear, and he always buys food in bulk and sponges off me whenever he can, despite me being a student and him having a full-time job.
  2. A dishonest womenizer: I honestly have absolutely no problem with people who chose for their sex life to be made up of one night stands. I do have issues with people who aren't upfront to their partners about "not being interested in a relationship right now" from very early on. Cue: 21 year old foreign students following him around the flat like little puppy dogs, a different one at least once per week. And I have to be all polite to them and not let on that I'm completely unable to distinguish them from each other.
  3. Pretentious: He refuses to have a TV in the living room because it is "distracting" and he has "better things to do", but spends ages downloading and watching stuff on his computer. He also says he likes fast boats because they are "more sophisticated than fast cars". Right.
  4. Annoying: "Better things to do" includes, as he is doing at the moment, firing an air gun from the corridor, past my bedroom door, aiming for a target he has arranged in the far end of the kitchen. While I am purportedly trying to study. And he knows I hate loud noise. Notice that I have to wear headphones if I watch DVDs on my laptop "because it's really noisy".
  5. Lacking in knowledge of the flatmate code: Since I moved in here, he has both eaten my Godiva advent calendar (which he replaced with a box of not as nice chocolate when I pulled him up on it) and installed a girl visitor in my room while I was away for a week, without notifying or asking me.
So OK, he has good sides, he is I think at heart a very caring, loving man, but he really needs to grow up and get his act together. He is incredibly cantankerous and very absolutist in his ways of thinking, which I think contributes to him having exactly four friends that I know of. The only party I have known him to be invited to, was his manager's 40th birthday, which I don't really think counts as an actual instance of social contact, as they never normally socialise. I'm sure he would be great as a friend if only I didn't have to live with him. Roll on my parental upfront inheritance so I can get a place of my own.

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